


Rain and Ink

by coveredkoi (serenamaes)



Category: Peacemaker Kurogane
Genre: Anal Sex, Love, M/M, Shinsengumi - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-21
Updated: 2012-07-21
Packaged: 2018-12-23 21:49:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11998611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenamaes/pseuds/coveredkoi
Summary: Time is running short for the Shinsengumi as the Bakamatsu Period nears its end. With time running out Souji and Hijikata are desperate to take in as much as they can of one another. Though both men know the end is nigh, they find it hard to say it aloud to the person you love.





	Rain and Ink

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Matsuoasuka](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Matsuoasuka).



> Inspired by a visit to Mibu Dera in Kyoto on a soft, rainy day during my study abroad in Japan.

The rain washed over the rocks in the teagarden as two lovers slid against one another in unison. While other members were patrolling the area, Hijikata had volunteered to watch over Souji. Originally, this happened as a means of watching over his progressing disease, but now it was a desperate attempt for the men to memorize each other’s warmth.

The anti-shogunate troops were gaining ground in Kyoto, and the power of the Shinsengumi Police Forces began to dwindle, burning at the edges like a moth nearing a flame. The groups had already moved many times, and these two men knew that sooner rather than later, they would have to part from one another. Shinsengumi members had been assassinated, foreign sentiment was rising, and the group members were talking of division. 

“Hijikata-san,” Souji breathed quietly as he looked at the ceiling. The hazy violet sky matched the grey glitter in his eyes. The rainy season brought out the natural pallor of his skin. He waited a moment to catch his hitching breath. Two months prior, he was still allowed to explore the grounds unaided, but the quality of his breathing recently took a turn for the worst. It was unlikely that his condition would improve. Bamboo clicked in the distance, and Souji brought himself to ask a question that had been weighing on his mind. “Are you going to Touhoku?” he asked the Vice-Commander quietly. His usual smile had softened into his lips, spreading a sad line across his face. 

A bit startled by Souji’s question, Hijikata contemplated how to answer. While the plan had been suggested, it had not been put in to place. Well, not yet. The older man sighed and pulled Souji closer to his chest. The smaller man shivered with the heat exchange. “Souji,” Hijikata began.

The hesitation, however, was enough to confirm Souji’s anxiety.

“When were you going to tell me?” Souji sat up, exposing his thin ribcage. Purple bruises were already forming on his neck, blending into his raven hair at his nape.

Hijikata’s lips tightened. He began to lift himself and propped up on his elbows. As he looked up into Souji’s face, the pain in his lover’s expression hit him. It were as if Souji’s eyes were cutting him in the stomach. He couldn’t bring himself to speak. He knew he had hurt the boy deeply, and it would be more disrespectful to his lover if he were to deny the dishonesty.

Souji sat back on his calves and reached for his yukata. He pulled it over his shoulders, quickly, as he stood. 

“Souji, you shouldn’t,” Hijikata began again. As the taller man stood, black yukata in hand, he realized that he wasn’t talking to the usual person he held in his arms. He had only seen the boy this way a few times before, yet he knew this side of his lover better than anyone. He reached for Souji’s wrist. “Souji!”

“Let me go!” Souji broke the man’s grasp. His eyes narrowed and he tied his obi. The white yukata hung loose at the collar, exposing his marked chest. The bruises brought out the raging violet in his eyes and the cool undertones in his skin. He met the gaze of his lover, and his legs shook under his own weight. 

“Souji,” Hijikata started once more. He was interrupted, however, as a tear fell to the floor, staining the soft tatami.

“You were just going to leave without telling me?” Souji choked on his voice. “Do you think that I couldn’t hear the others talking outside while I’m in here all alone?” He lifted his wrist towards his face, stopping short rather than wiping the tears off his cheeks.

Hijikata stepped towards the smaller man, but almost instinctively, the frail frame moved away. “Souji.” It hurt to see his lover cry. “The plans haven’t been finalized. We haven’t received permission to move.”

“Don’t lie to me!” He threw his arm to the side. The yukata opened, sliding off of his small shoulders. His eyes were like ice beneath the raven bangs. “Hijikata-san, I’m not a child anymore.” His voice shook, but his words were chosen rather meticulously. “You can’t hide these things from me.” He looked away from the taller man. “I thought we were in this together.”

Taken aback, Hijikata’s mouth turned into a frown, and his eyebrows furrowed. To others, he would look more serious than usual, but to those close to the demon, it was an expression of hurt. Yet, despite Souji’s sudden change in demeanor, it was still his Souji. He wouldn’t disregard the feelings of his lover. “Souji.” He couldn’t think of anything to do, so he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around the frail boy.

Souji’s breath rattled quietly as he clenched onto the black fabric. For a short moment, the soft rain amplified the weight of the embrace. But after a small rumble of thunder in the distance, Souji spoke.

“It’s because I’m dying, isn’t it?”

Hijikata’s eyes widened. He gripped onto his lover’s shoulders and pulled him closer. “Souji, how could you even say such a thing?” He pushed him against the closet door roughly, and the boy winced, coughing at the sudden pressure on his lungs. Hijikata’s eyes sharpened and he looked into Souji’s face. “Why would I treat you any differently now?” He took those wrists in his hand, and held them above Souji’s head. The smaller boy’s obi loosened, and his yukata spread. 

“Hijikata-san,” Souji began. His eyes softened as Hijikata leaned closer to him. His heart began to race. While it wasn’t unusual for the older man to be rough, Souji hadn’t been handled this way since his body weakened.

“You think that I’m only after you for your body, Souji?” Hijikata supported himself with his left hand, leaning over Souji to keep the boy from escaping. He continued to hold his wrists, and tightened his grasp. Souji’s heartbeat was audible over the rain, and before he knew it, he found himself pressing his lips against his lover’s.

Souji closed his eyes and welcomed Hijikata’s kiss, but the older man broke away shortly after. The sound of water outside swelled and clicking bamboo echoed through the empty grounds.

Hijikata couldn’t find the words to break the silence, and found himself scanning the features of his lover’s face. The boy was like a porcelain doll, and the pale light outside only illuminated the softness of his natural beauty. He wondered how their relationship ever came to be to the point where it was now. Only a few years before had they been mentor and student, Vice-Commander to Captain. Now, more than anything else, he loved the boy before him. 

His eyes betrayed his thoughts, and his expression softened. “Souji,” a wry smile twitched on his lips. He stroked his lover’s cheek with his left hand, and before he knew it, he was faced with a devastating reality: His Souji was going to die. The weight had been in the back of his mind, but he could ignore it no longer. The burden quickly affixed itself in his chest. He closed his eyes and placed his hand over his furrowing eyebrows. Releasing Souji’s wrists as the feeling amplified.

Souji’s eyes widened at the pained expression on Hijikata’s face, and his own chest grew heavy. “Hijikata-san,” his voice shook as his lover was overcome with human emotion. A single tear rolled down Hijikata’s cheek, and the taught line on his face fought the devastating transition. Souji found himself biting his lip to stop the sobs, but tears formed in his eyes despite the effort. “Hijikata-san,” he choked and touched his lover’s face, kissing the tear off of his cheek. “Hijikata-san,” he began. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry-”

Hijikata took Souji’s wrists in his grasp again, but this time much more gently. He planted his lips on his lover’s. “Souji,” he growled quietly, “I would never leave you so easily.” He wrapped his arms around Souji’s waist and kissed him again. The boy had no reason to apologize. More importantly, he didn’t have time to waste with petty words. Souji gasped at the forceful kiss, but wrapped his arms around Hijikata’s shoulders. He laced his fingers into the older man’s hair and held on as he was carried to the futon.

It was rare, but not unusual, for Hijikata to love Souji so openly. The Vice-Commander skipped the rough, taunting foreplay, opting for a softer approach to intimacy. The two tangled themselves in one another, memorizing each other’s body with their hands and mouths. The humidity in the air rose. Fabric was tossed aside. Sighs and gasps quickly filled the air.

Hijikata looked up at Souji from the boy’s ivory thighs. “Souji,” he breathed against his lover’s skin, “Get on your stomach.” He kissed the tender bruises his thumbs had left a day before, and he sat up as Souji repositioned himself. It wasn’t long before the Vice-Commander brought their hips together, moving into the smaller boy fluidly. Souji groaned at the sudden heat pulsing inside his body, but smiled against the blankets and clutched onto the fabric. This position was relatively easy for the boy to sustain despite his weak state, and he relished the way Hijikata held his hips.

Outside the Shinsengumi troops began returning in shifts, walking past the room unaware of the love inside. Souji bit his knuckles as Hijikata rammed inside and whimpered as he came into the Demon’s hand. Hijikata came shortly after, unable to bear the deliciously tight heat. He kissed Souji’s shoulders softly and disengaged. After allowing Souji to catch his breath, he rolled the boy over, leaned into his sweet embrace, and continued to touch his small body. The cycle repeated itself and ended with the clamor of dinner from the neighboring room.

Hijikata kissed the top of Souji’s head as the boy slept soundly. Souji had made it a habit of falling asleep against Hijikata’s chest. He rolled to the side at the sound of a shutting shoji screen, and the older man took the opportunity to make his way to a small desk at the corner of the room. He mixed ink, and loaded the brush. He knelt next to his lover and began to trace the brush across Souji’s white skin. The ebony liquid contrasted beautifully, and Hijikata found himself composing a poem to his lover. 

_The rainy season_  
Time like fleeting whispers bring  
Ink on rainy days. 


End file.
